Venting fine. And what I learned, and I might get shit for saying this but you don’t need support. I was taught in treatment that family or friend support was such a huge part. Even though I had family support I never accepted or took it. The only person you have to believe in is yourself. Look for support in yourself. I know how it feels to feel like you’re stuck in a hole and never going to get out but I swear, it’s possible. I’ve been PAST rock bottom multiple times. Killing myself always is an option, but it’s not a solution. I kept in my mind that tomorrow could be better and there’s a chance for me. I stopped looking in mirrors and I showered in the dark because that’s what it took. Honestly I know that all the times people have told me when I was feeling so low that things would get better I called bullshit and thought, yeah, maybe for you but not me. But it’s true, it gets better if you work your ass off in recovery. I smile everyday because this disorder has NOTHING on me anymore. I am so in control and the days I feel like going back, I remember how happy I am now. I am so fucking happy compared to how I was because ED doesn’t control me. It takes a lot of time and a lot of falling but you have to get up. It takes a while for your mind to catch up with you even after you start doing better so remember that, too. I will swear on anything and promise that life without ED is worth so much more.