I feel like I’m missing something although things are going the way they should. I hate that phrase, though. No one really knows how things are supposed to go or pan out because things can change in a matter of a few seconds or days. I’ve learned that quickly. I have few complaints lately but I still have that hollow feeling in my chest that doesn’t go away— That constant headache that’s more of a reminder that maybe I should just sleep and shutdown instead of thinking, feeling, doing, and living. None of my actions feel right but there’s no right or wrong when I have no actual direction anymore. I’m doing all that I can possibly do, I’m working the hardest I can and it’s hard to feel like I’m not running myself into the ground. I keep thinking of the outcome in the end but things keep coming up on the way that make me feel like I can be doing more and more, but there’s not enough hours in the day for all of it. I’m just so drained, and in need of something that’ll make it bearable.
someone is going to die on a vine video someday there is going to be a vine of someone murdering another person
Hahahahahahaha I think I laughed longer than I should of.
Whenever I write I always seem to use past tense. “I remember you would” or “You would always” or an “You had said this”. There is hardly ever once anything happening currently. It’s always in the past. And it is always from a male’s perspecitve. And always it’s as if the person I’m writing about is gone. Someone that was once there but now somehow, tragically, unfortunately, through some rough series of events, they aren’t. I write about the most disgruntled things. Awful depressions. Things that have went badly wrong. But it’s never happening in the now. Never now.
It makes me wonder.